7 Reasons Why People Don’t Like You
We are often surprised when we meet someone new and in minutes, we feel they don’t like us. They flood us with negative signals every second during the talk.
Others, in just a matter of days or weeks after we met them, the story repeats itself.
There is a science behind this. Here are 7 reasons on why people don’t like you.
You criticize too often
I know. It happens without knowing it. We think comments like “you are a nice person, but black clothes do not go with your look”.
You have just offered a sincere piece of advice to someone because this is the right thing, isn’t it?
Not really. When this type of observations are made too early in the relationship or too often, things will not go very well. They will consider the comments as being misappropriated.
You complain to other people too much
I face my own day to day bad things the same way you do. But do you tell people around you with the same frequency as they occur? We all have ours, don’t really need an extra shot of negative dose from anyone else. We barely survive ours, don’t we?
What to do instead? Put them in a positive light. If you did not get that promotion at your job, don’t complain about it. Talk about it and continue with something like “.. do you know someone who may benefit from my expertise and is looking to hire?” (put the forward positive thinking into action, be the problem solver)
You fear of being yourself and hide behind a character
You have just met someone you really like. Instantly, you decide that you are not good enough to impress him by being you, and you start to play a character. The one who “knows it all”, the one who is smart, popular, wealthy and “always busy” for unimportant things.
Do you find yourself in this scenario? Why don’t decide to just be yourself, and let people figure if you are their type or not. To be ready for this, get over the fear of rejection and social exclusion.
You don’t listen enough
If you’re like me, then talking might be something you enjoy. Listening to your own words may feel great, but this is not so great when you want people like you.
The golden rule: listen twice as much as you talk. It’s a skill. Learn it.
You’ll enjoy it more once you find out how many new and interesting things you can hear about.
You always “add more value” to the conversation
This is my favorite. I don’t know why, but as an entrepreneur, there is always a better and smarter guy in the room telling me how my business idea is 10x better if I just make a few small adjustments to it. It happens every single time. I tell my idea, and they come with more value to it, making mine looking obsolete and too small.
You always find reasons why it won’t work
I am not trying to diminish your expertise, but when you come up with a dozen of reasons why everything I believe in will not happen, this annoys me.
If you have this habit of destroying anyone’s dreams and goals (even if you think you say it in good faith!), please stop it. I will not like you. Everything I need is hope, encouragement, and a reality check from time to time.
You talk about boring stuff and you lack energy
I combined these two because somehow, they are tied tight one to each other. When you are bored, you kind of lack (positive) energy too.
Do you see how enthusiastic people talk, walk and spend their time? We are all attracted by them. It’s so much fun to be around!
Feed your mind with better thoughts and better ideas. Then share them with those around you.